Analog Thoughts on a Digital Age

Wednesday, June 30, 2004

Movie Locations

I live in a very densely populated part to San Andres bukid where you see kids playing badminton in the streets and young girls flirting with the jobless young college graduates. If you walk a little southward of Zobel Roxas street, you will see an old tindahan in the corner placed below an old residence made of wood. Look into the street crossing Zobel Roxas where the tindahan is, you'll see a small red room extending from the tindahan' side like a big red tumor. I say red because the room is colored blood red. If you look at ti really hard it will look familiar to you if you saw Mark Meily's "Crying Ladies". That's the small shack Sharon Cuneta's charagter lived in as a single ex-convict trying to make ends meet working for a chinese store owner. The tindahan was Hilda Coronel's character's sari-sari Store. The rickety second floor apartment was Edgar Mortiz's character's house where most of the "noise" going into Sharon's room comes from.
Mark Meily's "Crying Ladies will be shown in This year's CineManila opening tommorrow, to be held at Glorietta 4. I recommend you seeing it because it proves how much we can improve if we just forget about all that cheesy hollywood stuff. Not to say that there wasn't a tinge of hollywood in it. The idea was very original. It was our own. No cruise ships, no European cities as settings, just a simple story of a simple woman with a really strange job that is unique to the Philippine culture.

Speaking of film locations, here are some more...

Tuesday, June 29, 2004


I have been having problems with soap lately. I am in the process of making a study on what the most effective soap is.

Safeguard is nice, fragrant and very recognizeable. It has a smell that I have gotten used to as I grew up. The beige colored Safeguard is the most commonly used soap, I think.

I have also tried using Zest. One thing about Zest is it gets very hard when it dries up, so whe you try to use it for the millionth time it feels like its brand new, only smaller. However it feels like its loaded with chemicals you know, something "industrial" like what the that fish guy on "The Beach" wanted

Lifebuoy is very fragrant. you can put lifebuoy in a tray half filled with water and youll have it turn to mush, but your bathroom will smell like the pirated version of eternity sold in Greenhills.

Whatever soap you use, just make sure you dont do what my friend in Cebu did. He was a little too close to the toilet....

Friday, June 25, 2004

The Mad, Mad world of Britney Spears

I feel sorry for Britney Spears.
Sure she's the most popular girl in the world. Millions of dollars. Thousands of guys after her. However the way things are going, her image change from schoolgirl to slut, the 2 day Las vegas wedding/divorce,she must be inches away from losing her marbles. Then suddenly, this....
Just recently another story hit the papers concerning Britney Spears being involved in an accident.

Britney's mom accidentally ran over a paparazzi photographer after shopping for a pet at a local pet store. Britney apparently went into a panic attack after hearing what was described as a "sickening crunch" when the un"lucky" (corny pun intended) photog's leg got caught in the path of the left front wheel. Britney was so upset by what happened that she had to be consoled by the ambulance driver (intended for the photographer!)
The photographer had to wait for treatment on the sidewalk after they were done with Britney.The driver held her hand as she bawled, mascara trail dripping down her cheeks. She was clinging on to the new dog she had just bought at the pet shop. The pet was to keep her spirits up while she was recuperating from knee surgery she had which injury was the reason for the cancellation of ther world tour.

Inches....just inches away.

..or maybe it's just the stress she gets from studying Semiconductor Physics?
Click the image to view this page.

Thursday, June 24, 2004

Worst-Case Scenario...

Ever wondered what you would do in case your parachute failed to open during your routine weekly sky jump? Lets say you rode Cebu Pacific on the way to your lola's birthday when..shucks! The pilot choked on an airline peanut and passed out leaving the crucial task of landing to YOU!!! Lets say you were able to successfully crash-land the plane on the waters between Masbate and the Sibuyan Islands, you swim (or float), awaiting the next thing that flies accross the sky to signal for help, then suddenly....SHARK ATTACK!!! All of this during a nasty rainstorm with thunder and the open ocean.

My favorite Worst-Case Scenario is "Wrestling free from an Alligator".

Click on the image for more fun "Worst-Case Scenarios"!

Tuesday, June 22, 2004

Movie Review: "My Sassy Girl" (2001)

It was 2:30 in the afternoon, the end of my shift. I was ready to grab my bag and log out and take the bus to Pampanga after a long week of call center work whe I realized one thing. Once I get home, no one will be there. What can I do to pass the time? I remembered one of my office mates who is very fond of Korean and Taiwanese movies has this vcd of "My Sassy Girl(Yeoupgi Jeogin Geunyeo)". When I was teaching Korean expats in Angeles City 2 years ago, my students couldn't stop talking about this movie. They even showed me jpegs of the two main characters in Korean high school uniforms flashing IDs on a bar owners face (see image below). I always dismissed this as patriotism, being that Koreans have very rabid "love your own" attitude. So I grabbed it, "this should keep me occupied."

I am not a romantic film buff. I prefer independent releases and epic war movies. But there was something in "My Sassy Girl" that kept my interest for more than two hours. I'm not big on the whole "destiny" thing. Sure as heck, don't believe in it. But "MSG" comes across as being melodramatic and funny without being cheesy.
It does'nt abuse the "kilig" factor which a lot of our movies use as life support. No "Aga-Kristine"-type romance here. I heard that the lead characters aren't that popular in Korea in the first place.

The guy, Cha Tae-hyun, is a pop singer and this was his first feature. Ge kind of reminds me of Ranier from StarStruck for some reason. One cool thing about Tae-hyun is his facial expressions while watching Sassy Girl puke her guts out on the old man in the wig. He comes out as a lovable sissy when they break into a theme park only to be kidnapped by a runaway soldier. Jun Ji-hyun, only had a previous mediocre role in the movie "Il Mare" to her credit, but shines as Sassy Girl. I didn't really get hre name in the movie. She plays a really convinving drunk, a girl asking for trouble, a fragile wounded soul all in one breath. Plus, she's funny. The high heel shoes chasing scene is a classic.
There were also some parts in the movie that just made me go hmmm..
like in the first motel scene where Tae-hyun comes out of the batthrom butt-naked after answering the phone to be asked where Sassy Girl is to be picked up in her drunken state, and the police come seconds later just as he is about to pick up a towel to hide "himself". Another one whoud be during the "train game" scene with the lipstick line on the train floor. Although this may be one of the funniest scenes in the movie, the sudden appearance of a patrol of soldiers in a public train is rather implausible.

This film comes highly recommended for the idiots (myself included) who had ecountered their own "Sassy Girl" at one time or another. It will remind you of the time you got beaten up by a girl but didn't mind. When she drew attention to the both of you and you just wanted to shrink in shame. And when how much you missed her when she was gone. For the rest of you normal folk, its a good two hours of fun while learning Korean phrases like "Ya! ju-le?" ("Hey, wanna die?")

10 ways to win the Sassy Girl....

1. Don't ask her to be feminine.
2. Don't let her drink over three glasses. She'll beat someone.
3. At a cafe, drink coffee, not coke or juice, .
4. If she hits you, act like it hurts. If it hurts, act like it doesn't.
5. On your 100th day together give her a rose during her class. She'll like it lot.
6. Make sure you learn fencing and squash.
7. Also be prepared to go to prison sometimes.
8. If she says she'll kill you, don't take it lightly. You'll feel better.
9. If her feet hurt, exchange shoes with her.
10. She likes to write, encourage her.

Rocketboy's Rating: *** (3 out of 5)

Saturday, June 19, 2004

Imelda Marcos:"...more than just shoes and fascism"

You've probably heard about the new Documentary Feature by filmmaker Ramona S. Diaz about former first lady Imelda Marcos aptly called "Imelda". I can't wait to get a DVD and show it to my grandpa. It would be hilarious to see him cuss like a sailor in front of the TV again. The last time he did that was during People Power.

click here
for the "Imelda" movie official website.

Friday, June 18, 2004

My Top Ten Most Painfully Miscast Movie Roles

Have you ever seen a movie where you come across a character and said to yourself, "...maybe (insert actor or actress' name) would have played that part better". Or gone through a terrific movie with one flaw--one character that wasn't given justice, not because the actor was bad, but because the part just didn't fit him. I bet you have encountered cases where a whole movie was ruined because one of the major characters was "Just Not Right". Well, let amaze you with my vast stock of useless knowledge and give you my list of "Top Ten Most Painfully MIscast Roles" in both Phillipine and International movies. Enjoy.

10. Sean William Scott as Kar- Bulletproof Monk

Sure he trained for the role. He had moves. He had skill. But it's hard to see him without thinking of the perverted Stifler humping the back end of a pickup truck in American Pie.

9. Kris Aquino as the Activist Leader- Dekada 70
Although she only had a bit part in the movie as an Activist leader with a megaphone rallying the students around her at Palma Hall, she had the gargantuan role of convincing the "real" audience that a spoiled Atenista who has more regular facials and body scrubs than her monthly period can actually pass of as a student leader sympathetic to communist inclinations. Sad to say, she failed.

8. Lito Lapid as Lapu Lapu - Lapu Lapu
Im sure he had good intentions with this movie. Truth be told, I admire the effort he took in learning Cebuano and reseaching for the role. The fact of the matter is, The idea of a Kapampangan playing the role of a visayan tribal leader just doesn't jive with me. Plus did you notice that he was clean-shaven? Lapu-Lapu's "tabak" was probably as sharp and as close as the Gillette Mach 3

7. Harrison Ford as Alexei Vostrikov -K19 The Widowmaker
Come on, who was convinced with his terrible Russian accent?

6. Edward Norton as Steve - The Italian Job
I love Edward Norton. He's one of my favorite actors. I like him particularly in American History X and Fight Club. He is good as the everyman, the uptight white collar slave, the neo nazi, the helpless victim. He just isn't "hateable", which is why he was wrong for the part. Steve was a snitch, a crook with no word of honor. He stole from the people who trusted him. This guy was supposed to be satan. He still ends up being the nice guy that he is. I actually felt sorry for him in the end.

5. Diane Kruger as Helen -Troy

Who was this girl anyway? Helen's character acording to Homer's Iliad was supposed to be so alluring and beautiful that men would fall in love with her on the first glance and "launch a thousand ships". The Producers could have done better by putting in some unknown model-type girl and not baywatch-type Diane. There is a movie currently in circulation in the pirated CD section of your local palengke called "Helen of Troy". Sienna Guillory played Helen (see image below) and she was good for the part too. If only they could find someone like her to have played Helen in "Troy".

4. Colin Farell as Bullseye -Daredevil
The role was originally offered to, but turned down by Vin Diesel. Colin is very good as the sleazy, slick hustler or the pretty badboy, but not as a bald superhuman villain with a nervous tic. Bob Goldthwait would have done a beter job. Plus, Colin has an oddly shaped head not like Diesel's well defined dome. To see him bald just adds my disrespect for the character.

3. Daryl Hannah as Cynthia Carter - A Walk to Remember
Dont you think its a little bit too early for Daryl Hannah to be accepting teenage-son-advice-giving mommy roles. Sure theres Susan Sarandon and
Diane Keaton, but Daryl is nowhere in their age bracket.

2. Al Pacino as Big Boy Caprice- Dick Tracy
Sure he was a gangster. The Godfather. Michael Corleone. Aside from being one of the worlds greatest screen actors, he broke the mold of the gangster image. To see him play another stereotypical gangster was just pitiful.
Maybe he was in it for the costume.

1. Robert de Niro as Fearless Leader- Rocky and Bullwinkle
I have to be honest. I didnt watch this movie all the way through. It was just too painful. Did Bobby do it out of love for the character. Good heavens, I dont think he did it for the money. There was even a part in the movie where the director shamelessly had him utter the words that he made immortal as Travis Bickle ("Are you talkin' to me?") in Taxi Driver with a silly nasal pinched voice. He was so cool as the unstable Travis but he killed that for us. I wonder if he was on crack while making the deal for this movie?

Thursday, June 17, 2004

Album Review: DREAM THEATER "Six Degrees of Inner Turbulence"

In the rock and roll world, when you hear the name Dream Theater, your'e talking hard guitar and keyboard licks complex chord progressions, odd time signatures but most important of all, netherworldy melodies and rhythms so difficult to reproduce that even the most accomplished musicians in the rock and roll world would be left scratching their heads saying, "how the f*&k did they do that?"

I had been looking for their album "Six Degrees of Inner Turbulence" for the longest time. I had already previously purchased their latest album "Train of Thought" from one of my "Quiapo contacts" (wink, wink, nudge, nudge). "Six Degrees..." was never released locally. It took me two years to finally get myself a pirated copy.

I was not dissapointed.

The album starts off with "The Glass Prison". This song picks up where the left off in "Scenes from a Memory"...static, but what comes after that is everything but.

The highight of the first disc is the epic "The Great Debate". A song with the the controversial experimentation on stem cell research as the theme. On some of the message boards, the fans provide very interesting commentary on the objectiveness of this song with regards to the morality of the topic.

The second disc contains just one song, the 43 minute theme of the album "Six Degrees of Inner Turbulence". This song, is in my opinion, Dream Theater's crowning achievement in terms of song lyrical content. It does not fall short of the technicalities of the first songs in their early albums, although they save up on showing off their chops on this one, which is always a good thing. Its good to know that they have finally concentrated on really making songs that one can ponder on instead of their extended music tutorials. They had also previously made some real lyrical content improvements with "Scenes from a Memory", this one takes it to the antiseptic-smelling hospital halls, the screams from the isolation chambers and the silent cries for help in the suburban front yard.

The central theme of the song is a six part study on mental instability. The first cut is the "Overture" or a summary of the music thgemes throughout the song. It then kicks off with "About to Crash" which is about manic depression. A very toouching portrait of a man's love for his delusional wife.
"War Inside My Head" is a heavier section with a take on Post Traumatic Stress Syndrome, or war shock. One may relate to this as John Rambo's condition in "First Blood".I didn't quite get the exact theme on "The Test that Stumped Them All" other than some references to shock treatment and solitary confinement on a padded cell.
It slows down with "Goodnight Kiss" about a child dealing with the loss of her mother.
My favorite part is "Solitary Shell" which is about autism. It's jazzy, almost alternative tone kind of sets this section apart from the rest of the song and kind of gives it a reverent homefront type feel. have a cousin who is autistic and could relate to the lyrics narrating the behavior.

"As a boy he was considered somewhat odd,
kept to himself most of the time...
...but in every other way, he was fine".

I bet he'd like this song too if he could get
a chance to hear it. I gave him my Rush "Test for Echo" and I heard he he loves it.
We are all a little insane, sometimes we have the guts to admit it, but often times it is much easier for us to just label someone elsa as insane to make ourselves feel better.

All in all, this is probably is the best album I have listened to in the past two years. Ironically, this album had already been previously released for two years. This album restored my faith in music as an escape to another world, which is always a good thing, considering the present situation.

Wednesday, June 16, 2004

The Deng Mangalagu Project

500 friends.

Well it has been ages since I touched my friendster account. I only finally got to manage it today.
It all started out as a way for me to waste company money while not taking calls. January saw the end of a very gargantuan queue over the hoidays.

My friendster account was getting really boring. Everybody I knew who ever bothered to create an account was already in my friends list. Those who I invited, but didnt know personally, either accepted my invitations, you know, just to be polite, or rejected them because they thought I was psycho. My online life was going to the dogs.

Then I got this bright Idea.

Since most of the people I invite at friendster are girls (pretty ones at that), I thought, "Why not create a profile just for girls, -- Kapampangan Girls!"

I originally used one of my junk email ads as the target email ad and signed up as "Deng Mangalagu". Kapampangan for "the pretty ones". First, I invited the ones I knew. Made testimonials for them. It was pretty standard it went:

'ala ng lalagu pa kareng KAPAMPANGAN!!!

Come February, girls were starting to ask for invitations to my new profile. I got an average of 10 friend requests a day. I was lucky to get 3 in a day in my personal account. Surprisingly enough, a lot of these girls hail from the States and Europe.

The testimonials they give are equally amusing. Here are som examples:

"Pampanga chicks have a touch of elegance, an aura of sophistication, are intellectual and are gosh dengit very beautiful indeed. I miss Pampanga! Y'all will always rock and I'm proud to be one indeed! We'll forever be malagu =P Mwa to all!"

"ahahahaha!!!kapampangan r indeed damn pretty nd hella kewl...juz l0ok ol dosh kapampangz..such a switteheart nd possess fascinatin beauties...lolz proud 2 be one of them...talagang mangalagu tmu...tnx fer addin me hir...ala ng makasambut keng lagu tmu dba?..aite den...ima bawnce off fer now...god speed!!!KAPAMPANGAN BEAUTIES...KIP ROCKIN...>>>payce outz! :P "
-Glad'z Haven

"dAkAl pUnG sAlAmAt aT mIyAbE kU kEnI... tAlAgAnG aLa nG lA2gU pA kEkA tAmU nEh?! hEhEhE!!! aBa aKiT dA nMn iNg kAtUtWaNaN nEpO? lAwEn dA nAmU rEnG kEkAtAnG pIcS... lOl!!! kApAl... jOkE... bAsTa iNg aSaBi kUmU iT's sO nYc 2 bE hErE, KAPAMPANGAN ROCKS!!! mOrE pOwEr 2 aLl oF DengMangalagu!"
-Uber Luvr

"The true beauty of a woman is reflected in her soul; it is the caring that she lovingly gives, the passion that she shows; The beauty of a woman with passing years only grows ..." Kapampangan beauty reigns forever!

"im proud to be a kapampangan... eventhoguh im here in us.... i agree dat all kapampangan are beautiful....salamat king meg create keni....u rock....KAPAMPANGAN BEAUTY RULEZZZZZZZ......peace out!!!miss ko na pampanga.....huhuhu!? "

I laughed when I read this one:

"haha.. (cute nmn neto..)all ya kapampangan gurls out there.. be proud of who u r!!! fuck ol those ilocanos and bisayas.. cuz we're the pretty ones!!! hahaha.. PEACEOUT!!"

"I'm in Sales & Marketing so i always meet different kinds of people, usually the male species when they learn that I'm from Pampanga they would always have this same line that goes..."Kapampangan ka? Ahh kaya pala maganda ka!" kasi daw magaganda ang mga kapampangan.THIS IS TRUE! Need i say more?"


One very important thing I learned with this experiment is that Kapampangan Girls like to set themselves apart. They like the fact that they are being considered the prettiest of all Filipinas. It has, I think, something to do with the Kapampangan pre-disposition of being "mayabang". Just as much as the Ilocano has the same of being "kuripot".

I even had a guy congratuate me for reaching 500 friends. I would have posted his message but of course, silly me, I accidentally erased it.

I was in a rush to make the second account. We have a firewall in the office banning Friendster to be accessed through the intranet. Luckily, all you need to do is poke the refresh button a few times, the login page gets to resolve. I still havent put in my verification code but i already had 2 friends waiting to be accepted. Not to mention some copycats like "lalagu lagu girls" and "Kapampangan Hunniez".

Ms Zhang Ziyi is my image model.

She'd be proud

Tuesday, June 08, 2004

Smoke and tinnitus. Gig Review "Gods of Metal 9" ;Caliente Bar, Padre Faura

It was still 7:51 and I was already at the main entrance of the Caliente bar. "Hintay, hintay ka muna pare, wala pa kasi yung mga ticket, sorry", aplolgozed this long blonde haired guy in black leotards and 5 inch soled workboots. One by one came these troops in black, with smokes in onehand and their pocket in the other. T-shirts with the logos of Slayer and Deicide(?) silkscreened at the front. And Tattoos, holy crap. Tattoos. Where was I?
This was supposed to be my reintroduction to the Phillipine metal scene. I had been away from this crowd for so long it started out as very foreign to me, but after five minutes it all started to kick in. The attitude, the angst, ths smoke, the volume and the ocasional hawking ans spitting. Not to mention the generic chant "Rawk on, bebe".
Of course I was sitting in as quiet little corner in the bar when the first band came in. KRONOS was their name. I was impressed by the drummer, who was a chick. Their vocalist , who was also a chick did some really ear-splitting banshee wails in some parts of their set that got the crowd.
Then there was the second band LAVOS BECKON, which wasnt very impressive except for the guitarist who was probably too young to drink. He was carrying this 7 string RJ and was doing scales. I thought to myself, "these young guys get better and better" I was just sourgraping by looking unimpressed during the whole set.
The others were a blur, not very impressive musically. There were a few noteworthy moments though, like this death metal makeup band ARCHAIC ARGOT, with a singer who drew a knife and was doing stabbing actions to his stomach. One time, he actually exposed the large scar in his tummy probably from some surgical procedure or a childhood accident. Fear was their tool. I just hope he went and actually stabbed himself on stage. He would have done us a big favor.
Then there was this comic/novelty death metal band called CHAMBER 69. Here's how their set went..


(2/4 beat drums with bass and shredding distorted guitar for about 2 minutes)
audiernce applauds.

"Thank you, this next song is called "Genital Herpes"

(2/4 beat drums with bass and shredding distorted guitar for about 2 minutes, again)
audience applauds.

Thank you. They leave the stage.

Up to this moment I still cannot figure out what the freak that was all about.

The highlight of the night was FUSEBOXX and ETERNAL NOW. I came there especially for FUSEBOXX and I have to say that aI was not dissapointed. Their "Outlet" saga was probably the best piece of pinoy prog metal I have listened to since Wolfgang (although formatting their songs like YES and Dream Theater Songs does not exactly make them Progressive).
I even bought their independent release "Listen" being sold at the club entrance.

click image to see their site:

I can say ETERNAL NOW are a bunch of aliens who took the bodies of Filipino college students and to be able to play in their clubs and share their otherworldy music. Wow, can this band play. Their lead guitarist is obviously the leader and architect of the group. Dream Theater's influence is very heavy on these two groups. And I love Dream Theater!

The night was worth it. To say the least. I would do it again.

Friday, June 04, 2004

Geek ako. Obvious ba?

Its time that we acknowledge the inner geek.

Check out this neat article about...

Superhero Duels!

Music. My life.

I love music. I cant live without music. I have been listening to music since I was five - when everyone else was either still sucking their thumbs or sniffing on their stinky blankets, I was listening attentively to my Father's Chuck Mangione albums and my Uncle's Steve vai Tapes.
Every Song has a part that just defines it.
My favorite song part is Pearl Jam's "Evenflow"
In the near-end part of the song, the band just slows down and tones down with Jeff Ament just grooving on the bass. In the Music video, you might recall this as the part where Eddie Vedder climbs up the stage's scaffolding to prepare to jump into the audience. At the end of the 8th chord block they erupt into a loud last block after which Eddie bursts with an "EEEvenfloooow!".
This song defined my teenage years.

Here are the 50 coolest song parts of all time.

Click here
for Chuck Mangione's Site.

Click here
for for Steve Vai's site.

Thursday, June 03, 2004

The real meaning of the word, "Jologs"

So many "jolog" definitions on the Net and yet most are inaccurate.

I asked my students the origins of the word and they gave me all these palusot (weak reasons)--that it's the baduy, bakya crowd of the 90's, that like cockroaches, their number is legion, and they are here to stay. Seems that to most of them, it's even cool to be jolog, better than being coño. And though the pa-coño kids (junior social climbers) are frowned upon, the worst type of poseur, according to them is someone who's feeling

What to do....

Okay I had just started my first blogsite. It has been a while since I checked friendster and I miss it.

This blog will be about nothing. You hear me, NOTHING!!!

I wish I could write about
Harry Potter
,but I haven't seen it. I wish I could write about how much
The Day After Tommorrow
sucks, but I have not seen it either.